Happy new years for those who read this. I hope you spent it better than I did.
But I have to admit the holiday pay is quite nice.
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Monday, December 31
Saturday, December 29
I've thought about this much lately over the past few months.
Throughout the years I was blessed with a handful of great friends that shared similar interests with me and accepted the things I/we did as normal.
But that was the past.
Every great dynasty sees a shift in it's time. I can't exactly account for when the moment of our change occurred. Separated now, we barely find time for reunions.
But physically spending time with each other isn't what really counts.
Shared interests and ideas and understandings of each other.
I noticed that dissipate over time.
One wishes to be more social while one adapts to a new way of life.
The closest person I relate to now is Gabe. We seem to share a similar road in every venture of our life. I think it's mostly because we resist an ultimate change in self tooth & nail.
David & I still relate but a lot of his aspirations have changed as with Matt.
I only write about this because I notice that the gap is growing. I'm lucky to have a wife otherwise I'd be totally alone.
It's no guess, I'm bad at making new friends and acquaintances. I don't really fit in anywhere.
Out of everyone I know that is a friend, I believe Gabe will be around the longest and David also, though I watch for changes in his aspirations as they might shorten this expectation.
Eventually I am going to start trimming "the excess". I'm very bad at trying to keep dangling relationships alive. I simply don't have the drive to keep in contact with people from the past that I feel won't work out. (As I did with Cesar the first time and now I fear a second coming as well).
I go through the process of Contesting -> Accepting -> Resting.
I'm almost finished with the contesting phase and I now feel that I am moving to acceptance.
It is tragic I suppose, many years fade away into oblivion but some change is inevitable. We learn to grow and respond differently with each passing time.
I don't believe I'll be lonely any time soon as long as I have my family to stay by my side. Along with my other few friends that I didn't list here.
But as the great Mr Cash once said: "Everyone I know, goes away, in the end..."
Wednesday, December 26
I was given the complete Calvin & Hobbes collection as a Christmas gift, one of the best gifts I've ever recieved.
I've enjoyed Calvin & Hobbes for much of my life. Ever since buying my first collection, Something under the bed is drooling, I've been hooked. And how could I not be? Not only were the strips funny (something that's fairly expected of daily comics) it was imaginative, well written, and fun to look at. Over the years I grew, but so did Calvin & Hobbes. In the early years of the stip the images were more explicitly cartoonish and the style and feel of the strip had an air of immaturity about it. Over the years the images became more and more vivid, sometimes causing me to enjoy rereading strips simply to take in the vivid visuals and style. The writing and themes of the strip also grew and matured, taking on issues and ideas that I could relate to in the older years of my life.
The public has been given an opportunity, now that the strip is over, to see into the mind of the Calvin & Hobbes creator through the Tenth Anniversary Collection and now this complete collection. Mr. Watterson often talks talks of comics and art, of how he believes comics can be art. Can it?
Well, I can ramble and debate with myself about what art is exactly, but there is no need here. There is no need to wonder if art is something heartfelt and meaningful to the artist. There is no need to wonder if art is something with a message. There is no need to wonder if art is the triumph of technical abilities. There's no need to wonder these things because each of them rings true with Calvin & Hobbes, loud and clear. Calvin & Hobbes is art. And one of the finest examples of it I've ever had the pleasure of encountering.
And it just might be that Mr. Watterson was able to reach such levels of true art because of his love and passion for these works. He fought tooth and nail to keep his vision and intergrity alive. He fought to keep control of his creative property. And you can see this love and passion come to life in the exceptional quality of the strip. And not just in the strip, but the collections as well. Even the complete collection is produced in high quality binding and paper, and the layout is simplistic and powerful. It's truly inspiring to see such ideals of art to come to fruition.
The strip is over, but we're left with a gift. A call to create true art in whatever we do. A call to find our love and passion and imagination. And when we do we find the world is not such a bad place, it's not so uncaring and harsh and negative. Our love and imagination make it magical, and this magic is out there to discover.
Sunday, December 23
-Can we change the look and/or name of this blog? Yeah? Yeah?
-Man, I don't communicate much anymore with anyone from Houston
-I got hired to work where my girlfriend's mom works. $15.30 an hour, my highest pay yet!
-I'm thinking of buying a new computer
-I still want a Wii60, but I'm leaning towards a Wii. It's the superior system. But first I want a new computer, my current one is old and I think the fan's in danger of going out or something
Saturday, December 22
Commercial music. Am I talking about those "posers" who sellout their indie style to go mainstream? Yes! But not just going mainstream, I'm talking true selling out. Music literally being in commercials on TV. Hey, Moby got his break that way. Don't you remember the excellent Play album? Yeah, so back off haters.
Good new music that I first heard from TV ads:
Zune commercial: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=86YGj5D6I3k
Another Zune commercial. It's the best one on this list, so if you're thinking of not checking these out then at least check this one out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UoNtIkRm1HE
Target holiday ads (what can I say? I like the tune): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=goMa0dBCVPo
Wednesday, December 12
Let's face it folks, as Americans we are losing our grip on reality and life. What do I mean?
Easy.
We have people that will absolutely never develope critical thinking skills. So let's face it, the extent of our intelligence boils down to some kid on YouTube who thinks it is fun to put his face in an ant hill.
Wake up America! Wake up youth! You're coming into this world blind and when you walk with your eyes closed, you're bound to fall face first.
Tuesday, December 11
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Saturday, December 8
Well, I haven't updated in awhile. I went back to Texas to visit so I was offline for awhile. I'm using the word awhile too much.
I've been trying to learn game development lately, really picking up the pace shortly before I left, but the break slowed me down a bit. I had bought a book on game developing using managed DirectX with C# but it wasn't layed out or written to my liking. I returned that one the other day and bought a cheaper beginners game development book that covers C++ development. I like this book much better as the writer explains in greater detail and also covers Windows development for C++.
You know, I went to ITT Tech and got an Associates in software development. We had three C++ classes but they never covered Windows Development. In a way it makes sense because Windows consist of nothing more than a particular set of APIs. In other words, it has less to do with learning C++ and more to do with learning the specifics of the Windows API. But still, I wish we had learned some Windows development or some form of putting C++ to some practical use.
Before I left I was developing a Tetris clone using Managed DirectX but I may convert it to C++. I'd prefer that because C++ is more standard in the industry and it would work on systems that don't have the .NET Framework installed. On top of that C++ is just funner. I don't like high level languages and I feel I learn a great deal more with lower level languages. On top of that the performance is greater with C++.
I'm rambling. Oh well, I guess I'll go now. I should continue working on learning more as I spent the whole morning watching the entire FLCL series. Good show, check it out if you haven't seen it.
See ya!
Monday, December 3
Ah gotta love the surreality of it all...
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Sunday, December 2
Enjoy your stay
as you can see, there isn't much to report at this unholy hour
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This is a test
--
- Josh Jacobs
"Jenseits von Gut und Böse"
http://cynicalguys.blogspot.com - go read
Friday, November 30
So here I am once again still alive and thankful.
I've slacked off this week, very much so, playing halo for a staggering 16 hours throughout the week.
But at least I can say I am a Sargent with a Quadruple kill medal!!
Anyways
Things have been going as they should, work work off work off work work work work offfffffffffff work and repeat...
I really don't have any cynical reports this week,
Been testing out my new blackberry trying to act all important, balancing quality time with roxanne and ethan against work and friends.
So far so good, though I suppose I should have put up the clothes earrlier this week
ah well.
5am is rolling around quick, its time to retire
not from work though
too bad!!!
LOLZ!
too bad i cant think of a song right of the bat
off the bat
weird reading it
this house is awakening now
its defininatly time for me to re-t-ir-e
Sunday, November 4
This is dedicated to my loving wife, no matter how ludicrous I am, she's still there.
Let me address this rationally, calmly, and formally. I do believe that cynicism and negativity are two different things. The former being an attribute and the latter being a frame of mind.
The former is not negative in it's self.
Let me go into cynicism:
webster.com defines cynical as such:
cynical
Main Entry:
cyn·i·cal
Pronunciation:
\ˈsi-ni-kəl\
Function:
adjective
Date:
1542
1: captious, peevish2: having or showing the attitude or temper of a cynic: as a: contemptuously distrustful of human nature and motives
— cyn·i·cal·ly \-k(ə-)lē\ adverb
synonyms cynical, misanthropic, pessimistic mean deeply distrustful. cynical implies having a sneering disbelief in sincerity or integrity
I read this and think, DAMN! That's harsh, let me explain why this is true and untrue.
Cynicism gives way to such thinking that everything is ill-mannered, why? Because if that's all you believe then that's all you see. But I don't use cynicism as a frame of mind, no, that would make be a very negative person. I use it as an attribute to accurately look at things, justly and with a sense of neutrality. I use it as a tool to discern what's sincere or whats insincere in life. Primarily for the fact that I know their are liars and thieves among us. Yet I am still humbled by the acts of kindness from people. Reading the acts of Jesus and the miracles, looking at my child, my wife, my family. These things I find genuinely in. Don't get me wrong, I also find such qualities in other things as well.
I acknowledge the fact that cynicism can pave the way into negativity if you never humble yourself.
I might be guilty of only commenting on things I cannot form a positive opinion on, I'll work on that.
Let me move into negativity.
Webster states
negative
One entry found.
negative[1,adjective]
Main Entry:
1neg·a·tive
Pronunciation:
\ˈne-gə-tiv\
Function:
adjective
Date:
15th century
1 a: marked by denial, prohibition, or refusal
We see her negativity is such that it's a frame of mind. One who is negative sees only negative things and is not touched by the positive things they should be humbled by in life.
I can't really say I know any negative people. I do know people that have a disenfranchised outlook on life, yet they are moved by a few things.
The big difference I still stress here is cynicism as an attribute, negativity as a frame of mind, two are completely different from each other.
I can easy how a general mistake can be made by saying "he is a cynical person" if he never has anything good to say about anything and is always down. Correct yourself and say "he is a negative person".
I believe that my role models in my childhood gave me a cynical eye. No! This is not a bad thing! I have a very accurate perception on life and people.
Let me turn on my cynicism for a bit so that you may discern for yourself how this is not negative in any such way.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I will never be surprised by what humanity has to offer. I can acknowledge things such as the Holocaust and Hitler's regime and I can also see Jesus' words and teachings at work.
Humanity currently holds in their hands the future of each other. It is so universal it hurts. Yet, despite this unity between humans we easily disregard it and place barriers between us. Why?
Many reasons make us forget our bonds and notice differences.
Yet instead of embracing our differences we segregate each other.
Humanity must realize that climate change, war, economics, its a universal share. No matter how cheesy it sounds, we are all in this together.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
That was a cynical though. I accurately analyzed a brief stint of what's going on today. Not everyone will agree, and they are probably the ones that think I'm negative, but that's okay.
There are a few topics in which heats my blood and makes me more caustic at some times than others (i.e. Bush, media, politics) and that might seem more negative because it looks like that I am attacking rather than analyzing. Rest assured, I am still working the latter just in a more aggressive way, you may call this bitterly cynical.
Just like my comment today about how hundreds showed up for the dead little girl that washed ashore to sing Amazing grace - I asked why won't they do the same for the man and woman (2 separate situations) - I assume its because they see innocence in a child, yet they don't feel empathy for one who is older and unknown to them.
Sad.
But that's human nature.
Have I been negative in this post? Please let me know, but I have tried to accurately point out the differences between cynicism and negativity.
Little ghost, little ghost
One I'm scared of the most
Can you scare me up a little bit of love?
I'm the only one that sees you,
And I can't do much to please you
And it's not yet time to meet the lord above
now Internet ads, there's where I become bitterly cynical!!!!!!!!!!!
Friday, November 2
I wouldn't be so cynical if you weren't so fucking stupid !!
I do believe that's my new favorite quote guys!!
So let me hop on this post, get ready to eat this one up, I'm all riled up today.
The Bush Administration
I start here because its so damned easy. They/he has harvested and cultivated our fears since 9/11 and molded it in such a way that for months (and a few of you, years) we believed that he knew the the hell he was doing. Now, 4 years after the fact of the war starting, they/he indulges us in saying that the reason behind this war is because of 9/11. Get the fuck off that shit. The attacked happened and we stayed longer than we should. So we have this fucking piece of shit president, making a mockery of democracy, vetoing children health funds but easilygiving more money to our troops for armor. Ok, yes I get it, please protect them. But holy shit man, what about the children? Bush has corrupted what integrity was left in our political system. So, let's all look forward to 1.20.09. That's his last day in office. I hope someone throws trash at the man. Normally I wouldn't express this much dislike for someone, but hey, it's Bush, I can do that. Honestly, do I need to elaborate anymore on this topic?
Corporations = devil
You know, I wish people would STFU about this crap. Whinning bitches complain that the corporations are the devil. You know why? Cause idiots need a scapegoat (mine's Bush for the time being). Let's face it, some corporations rape the land, some help out people. If we didn't have large corporations then we wouldn't have a lot of things that we depend on now. They pay their taxes and yes they do try to cut corners and not pay as much. You would too if you had to pay $20B (or $20,000,000,000 for you visual people out there). Face it, they might not have all their interests in the right place but we as dumb Americans have become dependent on them right? Yes. You might not agree but I don't need you to, I know I'm right.
Britney is being speared
It's so damned scene to crack on Britney now days. I don't like her, in fact I just think she should disappeared. But come on, Yates killed her kids. Female teachers screwin' 13year boys. And we give them 15minutes in the light but not Britney. The way I see it, let her do her thing, but if the fuckin' media doesn't come up with some more interesting, better news, I am going to be pissed the hell off.
the end
yeah, I suppose I could write more, but I'm tuckered out, plus I have a few Tandem jobs I need to confirm ran so, back to work.
Breathe it in and breathe it out and pass it on its almost out / we're so creative so much more / were high above but on the floor / its not a habit its cool I feel alive / if you dont have it your on the other sideeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Wednesday, October 31
So I can confirm that I saw the first Christmas commercial yesterday, Oct 30th around 3pm, it was a pop-tart commercial. Now today, it's been a continuous on-onslaught of them.
Happy holidays.
Already.
;p
Sunday, October 28
Lego Chess based on their recent Castle set. Is that not awesome?
I've recently moved to California, something that allowed me the opportunity to realize a dream of mine and visit an official Lego store. A store filled to the brim with Legos, it was heaven. They had a small section filled with various people parts and accessories and allowed you to build your own custom Lego person to buy. Unfortunately, I never did buy anything. This Lego Chess set that I saw there definitely caught my eye, as did an extremely cool older castle set that included a locked door and little Lego key!
Admittedly that was awhile ago that I went, and I remain empty handed as far as buying from the store. I was just thinking of Legos recently and thought I'd share the story on this new blog. When I get a job I'm definitely going back!
You know, I mentioned this to my girlfriend just yesterday, that I'm really glad I grew up when I did. The 80s and to a somewhat lesser extent the early 90s were a great time period for kids. The toys, shows, etc, were more imaginative, simpler, and much more enjoyable. Today, kids shows are boring at best, and have little imagination behind them at worst. The toys are either overly complex or they're simply ridiculous (come on, battle armor Superman? Hulk punching through annoymous wall?).
Legos, however, above and beyond anything, defined for me the perfect toys. You are given pieces and your imagination is free to run wild. Not only that, you can learn simple engineering concepts, and improve precision motor skills. I had a friend when I was very young who really showed me the power of imagination. He would take pieces from his castle set and alter them in unique ways. He cut the arrows from the Lego quiver and made a sword sheath. He created a Lego armory/shop in his Lego castle. He painted a Lego breastplate black to make a dark knight. He even cut part of a Lego scimtar to turn it into a Lego katana.
Imagination is so wonderful to me. It is a calm peace in a world and life that can be chaotic. It's escape. And I'm thankful that there were and are products like Legos.
But still, I have to remember that there is a reality, and I need to take part in it.
Friday, October 26
Another George Bernard Shaw quote (you know, the guy who said the cynical quote under our title?) that I saw today:
"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself." -George Bernard Shaw
You tell 'em George! I dislike those messages which are along the lines of "You can only be who you are" or that you're destined to what you're born to be.
You have choice people! Go make those choices, and become the person you want to be!
Thursday, October 25
** Forgive me I lost a tangible run in this post, will update more correctly at a dater date.
So I'm pondering right now...looking at the emotional health of humanity.
Ok, ok, too big, the emotional health of America (at least any "well-developed" country).
I read this article on wired.com and it struck me in such a way that I'm actually at a loss for words. See, I believe that the entire race of humanity has done away with the handbasket and cashed it in for an express one way ticket to Hell. Can you blame me? Yet people find it in their hearts to care for some animal, who is one in a million, yet still unreplacable and unique as a human.
So let me wander in my mind a bit.
I believe I'm a cynical hypocritcal bastard (and I know that doesn't make it OK, Roxanne ;p) but I still feel compassion for human plights.
Or do I?
I can't tell! I hear about a cop going crazy and murdering 6 people that lived in a house cause he was angry, my response: "Cop's are bastards, that's what happens when you give them power."
Yet I showed no compassion for the dearly departed. Which I don't understand because if I see something else, at a different time, it will hurt to see them like that.
You know, a major impact for me on my empathy for people was my family. I care about them more than I do about someone in the news. Very un-Christian of me I know. Still I wouldn't want to see someone get hurt for someone's neglegence.
Let me render this hypothese: if the action is justifiable or not determines my reactions. And that's very loose.
- Someone could rag on me all day, I would probably careless
- Someone makes a rash comment about my family, I blow up
- Anything happening to a cop, I don't care
- Any incidents that happen because OF a cop, I'm pissed.
- The rich who are greedy deserve their "just desserts"
- Though they shouldn't be treated differently
- Music & movies impact me with emotions that I can't always explain/handle
- The media makes me bitter and scorn the damned!!
- Children are nice
- Teenagers are promiscious, lying, Hitlers!!!!!!!
So I think I have my point of confliction. I'll have sympathy for the devil yet I'll cut him down here he stands.
I suppose that's the point, I'll have sympathy but expect no sympathy from me.
Boo-yah.
But me address this: the media has not molded me this way. No, they might fuel my burning apathy towards violence and what not. Nor was it video games, they only warped my preception of reality (ha!). Nope, I blame it on the male Jacobs gene. and a tinge of Latin machismo.
Let me clarify: the Jacobs men are cynical, stern, unemotional, and unaffectionate. Now holding this in, I have to make an effort in my role as a 4th generation Jacobs man so that I can show my sons I love them (but without using that word later on) and making sure my wife's attentive needs are met. Not just to meet but to show her that I do infact care.
Though it is hard and I slip from time to time I can be caring towards them. But I'll always be a grumpy, hardass that can't cry.
Take a break, you little fake - I blow brains my out, you hesitate.
Wednesday, October 24
So why was I coerced in to creating a facebook? I don't know. No one will probably find me, just david and matt, even though I can easily call both of them. I'll probably delete it next week. Especially!!!!!! if someone from HS tries to contact me.
That was a bridge I burned long time ago.
Cynicism reports today?
- I believe that these fires are biblical. The earth is suffering from disasters time after time, I hope everyone is up to date on their faith!
- I don't think the application guys care much here, it's been over a week since my request for the installation of a CRITICAL APP has been put in. Despite my urgencies and complaints, nothing has yet to be done on this, just beauracies. (or however it's spelt)
- Waking up late, now that just sucks. I woke up at 4:50am instead of my 3:45am and I had to rush to shower and got to work at 5 till 6am. SuxXxOrZ. No I wasn't late. I just wasn't early.
- Thankfully I am out of my teriyaki bowls for lunch!! It will be nice to eat something else for a change!!
- I don't like it when people come in for tours, it disrupts my rythm in work. Especially since one guy (talking to professionals mind you - and he's one himself!) states to a group of guests: "you need interpreters here, one moment you could be speaking redneck and the next oriental..." I'll let anyone interested know when he has finished clearning his desk.
That's about it.
Oh now you're sober, how'd I know you say that?
Tuesday, October 23
For some reason this posted when it was only meant to remain a draft. I'll post it a bit later
Ok, I have two so far.
- No Soft Drinks for the year
- Learn C#
That's it so far.
class ExampleClass{
static void Main() {
System.Console.WriteLine("Hello, world!"); }
I'm posting alot today, hope nobody minds (and by nobody I mean the one other reader of this blog).
I ended up not working on the nibbles remake I talked about earlier tonight. I'm fooling around with 3D stuff, and tonight I was playing around with lighting. Sort of confusing stuff that, but manageable.
I also mentioned earlier that I intended to attempt to remake Dragon Warrior 1. Well, in the original Dragon Warrior the dungeons were rather simple mazes and didn't differ visually from one dungeon to the next. However, a rather unique aspect that I haven't really seen in any other rpgs is that the dungeons were devoid of light. You had to either use a torch or cast the "Radiant" spell to see a small amount of dungeon around you. Nothing visually fancy considering it was a very early NES game.
One of the ideas I've had for the remake is to make the dungeons first person and 3D. In case you don't know what first person means it's basically that you see everything through the characters eyes. A while ago I tried creating some 3D stuff but got frustrated and temporarily dropped the idea. Now though, with the recent advances I've made in learning how to work with 3D, I may consider bringing back the idea. I think it would look cool to explore dungeons in first person and have the torch illuminate the walls in front of you.
I've also recently considered the idea of attempting to make the overworld map 3D but I think I'll abandon that idea. I really should keep things simple for my first game. A 3D dungeon would be alot easier than a 3D overworld map. Speaking of the overworld map, it's pretty difficult to draw water and mountains that look good and that can tile easily as a pattern. But maybe that's because I haven't really put much effort into those yet: I've been stuck on the trees. On a whim, I tried planting each little tree programatically to see if it'd stress the system or slow down the program, but to my surprise it doesn't seem to break a sweat. It'd be kind of cool to be able to control each individual tree. But I'm not sure if that'll bog down the program too much once game mechanics are added in.
I suppose I'm done rambling. Again. Perhaps all this belongs in another blog, I don't know? Aiur, did you even read this far? Do you still read this blog? Is the blog still in an identity crisis?
It'd be cool if I had my own independent game company. Hey, I can dream can't I?
Monday, October 22
I beat Final Fantasy 3 for the DS today!
My thoughts on the game:
The game felt very old school, which is a good thing for me. It definitely took me back to the feel of the earlier NES rpgs. The graphics were excellent, which was slightly confusing. I found myself at times wondering why there wasn't more, given the level of the graphics. It felt as though they changed nothing of the layout or feel of the original gameplay. But overall that's ok.
They added more story than the original. The characters in the NES version were faceless and nameless, but here they were given personality and actual faces (even genders). In the first half of the game this makes things interesting, but the story takes on an epic arc and the characters and their personalities are eventually lost. I won't give anything away, but I will say there's not much to not give away. It ends up being your basic save the world story. But hey, that's the way it's done in old school, so I'm not complaining per se. I just felt they gave up on adding to the story in the second half.
At first I didn't know what to make of the job class system itself. I seem to have played these job class games in reverse order from best to worst. My first experience was with Final Fantasy Tactics, which had the best Job Class system I've seen, and possibly the best overall character development system I've come across in an RPG. The second game I played was Final Fantasy 5, which was a step down in many ways, but still enjoyable. So the jump to this game, which lacked the ability to carry abilities over to other jobs, or to train your characters stats by what job they were using, was a bit of a shock. It was basically nothing but picking what job you wanted to be. I didn't really get into this system until the very end of the game, where I decided I really needed to pick my go-to team to take down the last boss. That customization is enjoyable, but not to a level I'm used to in most other games.
And as a side note on the job class sytem. Something Final Fantasy Tactics did that this game does not (nor does Final Fantasy 5 for that matter) is make it so you gained higher job classes by training in certain jobs. In this game, Final Fantasy 3, you're merely give more job classes at certain points in the game. That just doesn't sit well with me; I'd prefer to work on getting high skills myself rather than having them handed to me at alloted points.
My final point is that the last area is very long. Well, it's not too long really, but the inability to save makes it seem very long in that you're forced to press forward until the end. Luckily the Quicksave feature will save you from having to sit there for over an hour or more, but it is the only point in the game where I noticed the lack of save points. It's probably not a game who's ending I'll be seeing often...
...Oh, and Lord help you if you die at any point. It reminds me of the relentless cruelty of other old school games like Ninja Gaiden who would send you back ridiculously far if you died in the final areas.
Did I say everything I wanted? I don't know, I could probably ramble for a long time. I will say that it's good as far as remakes go, the graphics are an excellent example of what the DS can do, and I'm extremely looking forward to the upcoming 3D DS remake of Final Fantasy 4.
I'm not so sure I have much cynical thoughts in me as of late. I haven't had contact with many people, and my attention has been reverting back to where it once was: videogames.
I'm currently attempting to make a game in C# 2005 (Is 2007 out yet? Blasted fast technology) using DirectX 9.0 (10's out...and holy cow does 10 make games look good). I went in to this knowing little about how games are made, but I've been sputtering along, and I feel I've made a tiny amount of progress. I tell you, it's hard to learn by simply using Microsoft's help files!
Yesterday I figured out how to make textured primitives. A sad breakthrough I'm sure, considering where pros should be at. But by golly little progresses make me happy, and slowly but surely I'm getting better. I'm hoping to possibly make a 3d landscape for my game.
What game? An rpg of course. I'm thinking of remaking an NES game: Dragon Warrior 1. I have many ideas on how to improve it. Still though, I haven't decided if it'd be more productive to work on my own original game.
And last night the idea hit me that I should try making my own version of "Nibbles", an old QBasic game where you're a constantly moving snake who eats things and gets a longer and longer tail. It was a game I tried making in QBasic long ago, but now I could make a pretty good version using what I know of DirectX! So I might try working on that tonight.
Oh well, if I do, I may post the finished results.
So really, I'm too tired to be really cynical today, much less even provide an iota of thought to my post. But here is something that ticks me off. Data access. I've been jumping hoops to get added to the right security group at work and it's still been a week! I've had supervisors and team leads escalate and still nothing!! They even say it's done!! I still can't install it!! sob.....
That's my complaint, eat, sleep, and be merry.
Sunday, October 21
Starcraft, what can I say? Both Aiur and I used to play this game together via network play and loved it. The insane opponents! Nukes everywhere, crazy swarms of enemies, desperate sieges that lasted untold amounts of time. It was great.
I heard about Starcraft 2 awhile ago and geeked out. The only information they had available was on the Protoss units, and they didn't have many landscapes to show. Still though, it looked insanely good.
Fast forward to now, when I decided to see what's new on it. New screenshots! Info about Terran units! More landscapes! And HOLY COW is it looking good! I'm geeking out all over again. So I thought I'd post some of my joy and some links.
http://www.starcraft2.com/screenshot.xml?s=53
Mind blowing graphics. I've said it before and I'll say it again. With advances in technology companies can make extremely good looking 2d games if they base it in 3d. I wish more companies would do it. This is by far the best graphics for any game I've seen a preview of, even Gears of War or any PS3 game. The water, shadows, grass and trees and cliffs, everything looks extremely good.
Of course, I may be going over board simply because I love Starcraft ;p
If you haven't yet, I'd recommend playing the original Starcraft and it's expansion set Brood Wars. Not only is it very fun (honestly, one of the most well balanced games I've ever played in my life), you get the back story so you'll be ready for this sequel. If you love to be as creative as me, it also comes with a nifty map editor. But if map editing's your thing, I'd either go for Warcraft 3 or wait for Starcraft 2, which is reported to have an even better map editor.
Better map editor! I love map editors! Geeking out!
Thursday, October 18
I don't intend this blog to be a negative one but more rather an accurate one.
As the quote states above, we got it.
LOLZ
Wednesday, October 17
The best way to describe human truth may be through experiences. Jesus made much use out of speaking truth through human experience by way of His parables. Short little stories of human events that contained fundamental truths of the human experience.
Why would that be best? Because the truth can't be quantified, much to the chagrin of scientists and philosophers alike. They want something neat and compact. Something that can easily be distributed and leave no questions. But life isn't like that at all. It's subjective, ambiguous, chaotic. And nothing captures all of that better than tales of human experience.
But truth is there. A fundamentally deep and pure truth. And it's only there for those who choose to see it. Like the parables of Jesus, like the fairy tales of old. Tales of human experience. Ultimately everyone sees what they want to see, but some can and do see to the core value of the stories, and to the truth that lays behind them.
Life seems chaotic at times, but there is a truth behind it all. That's the end of my ramblings for today :)
Tuesday, October 16
Ah, yes, existentialism. I firmly believe that life should be peeled away throughout it's absurdities and defined in the most appealing (to you) way. Though, not everyone might be mentally and spiritually prepared to dwell far into their existentialistic world still, everyone should at least try.
Like why do I always see things out of place? A chicken on 290, a dancing coke fiend on Mangum. Personally, I can define these things, very loosely, but still I can.
I just don't get how people wander through life with a quagmire foundation on what reality is.
The Hills. Someone shoot me if my validation in life is a $5,000 dress from some Italian brand-name store. God, life is more than that. At least to me.
I have successfully defined many points in my life as important and self-concluding that I have some purpose on this world.
Yet, the bigger picture still awaits.
And yes, existentialism has given way to a severe nihilistic view such as: not everyone has a greater purpose. They will live, make a "living" and die. But sadly that's what many people accept and live. Mayhap, it's not so sad as it sounds but we shouldn't all expect to change the world. We can however, change our world and the ones that are around it.
Be a good parent.
My sons has defined me. My wife has defined me. My family has defined me.
So live life and question it all, no matter how absurd it is.
Oh yes, the Zune.
I <3 ZuN3 LOLZZEz!!1!1!!!
I bet Sartre was my real father.
Monday, October 15
Hello all, we're back...I guess? What was this blog about? A game we were creating, eh? So what's this blog going to be about now? I don't know...
And how long will it stay in the annals of the internet? Will some person 30 years from now read this? Will they wonder who we were? I don't know why I'm waxing philosophical (did I even use 'waxing' correctly?), Google will probably just go bankrupt...ahahahaha! I jest, I jest. In all seriousness they'll probably just end up merging with Apple and Microsoft and taking over the world. Wars will soon officially be nothing but mass FPS contests.
Speaking of games, I'm currently trying to develop one on my own. For now it's simply a remake of an old classic NES game that I'm using as a basis for learning the process. Perhaps it'll evolve into an original game, I don't know, but recreating a game is a suitable enough challenge for now.
Hey! Maybe this blog will end up being about custom games? That'd rock. For real kid. And whatever else the kids say these days. Do they still say groovy? They should. Like the Brady kids. That's a classic show reference if you're wondering. You shouldn't be wondering, because classic TV is something everyone should enjoy (maybe not, because if it was Nick at Nite wouldn't resort to more and more recent shows).
Hey! Maybe this blog will end up being about classic TV shows?! That'd rock. I'm just repeating myself now, and this post is long enough, so see ya later
So I wanted to bring this back.
Funny story,we lost the website due to credit fraud.
project1000 has entered an indefinite hiatus
I've decided to turn this into a real blog, with a strange template.
Bob can change it if he wants.
ANYWAYS if anyone actually reads this, im going to route this through some domain.
ANYWAYS
let me comment on The Price Is Right.
I am a member of the Bob Barker Babysitting Club. He watched over me many a summer weekdays, I grew to such affinity towards him that I, like many others, were struck with grief. But he had to have his time to himself.
Today, television history took place and I am witnessing currently.
Today is the first day that Bob Barker is not on the show.
Drew Carey is.
I like Drew, but the awkwardness that he has with the show is...well...awkward. He offers the show a new fresh breath, I suppose if I can just get over the fact that Bob isn't there for me any more I will be okay.
The audience seems to receive him well.
The main difference is Drew's demeanor on the show: he is a comedian and Bob was not.
For the first show, he has done good. Thought still awkward, the show must go on!!
Still...who can pay $811 for a hammock?
Damn.
Souljah boy tell em....
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